Can I Go To Parties If I’m Sober?
Are parties still fun if since I’m sober now?
A big concern for a lot of people getting sober is wondering if you can have fun anymore. You absolutely can have fun in sobriety! First of all, if you really search yourself and look back over your time of using and drinking – you probably weren’t having fun anymore anyway. Especially if you ended up in detox, treatment, or recovery meetings!
The book Alcoholics Anonymous assures us we can have fun in sobriety, and we do not have to “avoid a place where there is drinking if we have a legitimate reason for being there. That includes bars, nightclubs, dance, receptions, weddings, even plain ordinary whoopee parties.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 101.
We can absolutely go back out into the world and have fun without drinking, but there are a few steps to consider before you go:
Check Your Recovery
Every person is unique in their recovery program. Some people can go back out into the world right away and others need more time to adjust to a sober lifestyle. You should work with your support group, be that counselors, therapists, sponsors, spiritual mentors, etc. to decide when that time is right for you.
If you are newer in recovery or going through a tough time in life in which you feel like you may be tempted to partake in old activities, then you can pass. You may also be more comfortable at a bar, but not at a concert. Someone else may be perfectly comfortable at a concert, but not at a bar. It’s good to find your own boundaries and limitations.
Some people find throughout the recovery process that they do not enjoy the same activities they once did. You may find new sober activities where there is no drinking involved at all!
Do you have a legitimate reason for going?
If you have a work function at a bar, or a family reunion where there will be alcohol, or a wedding – these are generally legitimate reasons to attend. Again, lean on your support group to determine whether you have a legitimate reason to attend a social event where drinking may be involved.
It is very important for you to carefully consider your motive for going to the event. If your motive is to maybe steal away a little bit of the old feeling and “live vicariously” through others, you may want to pause. If you are feeling grounded in your recovery and genuinely looking to have a good time and bring what you can to the party, then by all means – enjoy it!
Will you have fun?
To expand – if you would not have fun at a social event that you have the choice to attend or not, consider not going! In recovery, it’s not only important that you respect and protect your sobriety, but that you enjoy yourself! You may find new exciting activities that you’d rather do.
Now if it’s a work or family function that can’t be avoided, think about what you can bring to the party. What did you miss out on at previous work and family functions? This could be the time to make things right and begin participating, now that you are sober and able.
Enjoy your life!
The bottom line is that just because you are sober does not mean the fun is over! There are so many fun sober activities that you can do, and you can safely enjoy other parties where there is alcohol if you are in a grounded place in your sobriety.